Saturday, September 24, 2005

The Evil Plot on Canada

It has been a while since I posted anything, so I figured I'd better. Com'on guys, you got to help me out with this! Anyway, not much has happened recently worth noting, so I had to delve back in my memory to tell a story. One I hope all will enjoy. And I shall call it, The Evil Plot on Canada.

Once upon a time in the magical land of Kit. Co. there lived a young farm boy. As luck would have it, this boy was assigned the task of cutting hay north of the duck ponds, along the Canadian border, for Gator. The intricacies of this job were not such as to hold captive large portions of ones brain. Even this boy’s feeble mind began wandering, and soon he was pondering about our docile neighbor to the north.

Ah yes, Canada! Not so very different from the US. However, we find the need to strictly regulate the border. I imagine it’s needed to inhibit entrepreneurs from taking advantage of the differing government regulations, and resulting price differences in goods. Anyway, this boy looked upon Canada in a good light….waterslides, cheap theatres, confusing intersections, Cold Beer at Rear stores (beer doesn’t float BTW), much good times had by all. A great break from the hustle and bustle of Kit. Co.

Anyway, this being a warm day, the boy’s water jug soon became a good friend. When the boy had drunk his fill, he was full of water. Stopping, the tractor at the north end of the field to stretch his legs, he breathed deep relishing the fresh fragrance of cut hay as it wafted by. He looked around for any border agents, and carefully scrutinized the presence of a hawk.

He crossed the border under the watchful eyes of raccoons, deer, and hawks. –the grasshoppers not being worth mentioning. Whose petulance has befallen us in times past to rape the land of its greenery and all else in sight. One year the infestation was so bad, they overtook a schoolyard coating everything in layers and layers of hoppers all chomping away at anything and everything. This infestation was so bad that the corner was named after the incident. This boy knew it as the corner where nobody stops however. But I digress….

The boy made his assault onto the Canadian farmer’s field unbeknownst to either government. The boy found it much the same there, but liked it and took great relief there. He returned to the tractor noticing the coyote slinking off to the west to tell the tale. Oh-well, this world will always be full of muckrakers.

Anyway, the moral of this story was clear in the boy’s mind. –It can be a great relief to have good neighbors.

Friday, September 02, 2005

A Mini Adventure

So the other day (yesterday) I went to this place called Pine Point.

-It's a little campground with access to the Mississippi. Noticing that some unknown individuals had stolen all the wood that the US Forest Service had cut and left for campers, I recalled a few weeks proir when some unnamed persons took some of the wood from there for a camping adventure in Duluth. I believe that a US Forest Service representative will be calling them.

But I digress, this story is about yesterday.

Yesterday I was out there doing some reading and reflecting. After a while I decided to walk around and look at tracks along the paths. Then I followed a deer trail meeting a 4 wheeler trail which I followed a ways. Eventually I tired of this and went back to my car. I putted down the road watching for deer, then took this side trail from the forest service road. Great road for a saturn, but what can you do if all you got's a saturn. Anyway, putting along in 1st gear I saw something ghost across the trail in front of me a ways. I figured it was likely a deer. Eventually, I found the end of this trail and headed back, the saturn unscathed by its trip. Just before I got back to the road I met this porcupine. Not having seen too many of these on the prarie, I got out for a closer look. So I chased this thing off through the brush grabbing a stick along the ways. I got it to stop so I could poke at it a while to turn it around and see it up close. I don't think it liked me, and it took off again and tried climbing a tree. I wasn't done looking yet so I pried it off the tree from 4 feet up and got a good look at its belly as it tried flipping over. Ungraceful creatures if you ask me, poor acrobats too. Anyways, it started climbing again and got above me before I could stop it. I wasn't about to pry a porcupine off a tree above my head so I decided the games where through.

So I'm 10 yds in the woods and start heading out of the woods. When I got to the edge I noticed a wolf coming down the road to check out the commotion. He was 40-50 yds away and noticed me at the same time. He paused briefly, realizing what I was, he turned tail and trotted off. I thought this was neat chasing a porcupine and attracting a wolf.

So of course my next move was to go track the wolf a ways. He had come from the west followed the road towards me, then left the road heading east. The trail I had been on was to the east, and I began to wonder if the creature I saw on that trail was another wolf. If it was, I was in the middle of a pack of wolves chasing a porcupine. hmmph Interesting.

Then I went home. smiling.

A Wedding Story

There once was a man named Aaron. His wedding went off in typical fashion for his family. It was great! I arrived the night before, after the decorating was finished. (I R SMRT) At this point I learned that an unnamed individual with many tickets took a 100 MPH trip to Hibbing to pickup the tuxes before the store closed. Of course he met a cop on the way, but since there was no way for the cop to cross the median he kept crusing along. When he stopped at the store and was heading in, several cops sped past on the road he was just on. Hmmm.

That evening I was putzing around Virgina looking for my hotel minding my own buisness, just looking for a sign for fifth street. Suddendly, a cop pulled up behind me with flashing lights. He proceded to blind me with his spotlight -just for good measure- as he strolled up to my car. Apparently he had seen me pull into a drive, back out in no particular lane (since no one was coming), and slow way down at a green light (trying to read road signs). His interpretation of course was that I was drunk. Anyway, he ran my license then gave me directions to the hotel.

Aaron wasn't so lucky on his wedding day. When he left the hotel he turned the wrong way on a one way, which wasn't marked from that lot. he proceeded a few blocks like this and was noticing that the other three sides of the intersections had stop signs, but not him. Hmmm....oops, too late cause the cops noticed before he did. He got a ticket on his wedding day -mean cops!

Eight minuted before the wedding Aaron made a quick flight to the flower shop to pick up the flowers. I'm guessing he flew anyways cause he was back in short order having traveled a fair distance.

Well anyway, I think the wedding went quite well. The best man was even able to find and identify the correct ring. The reception was enjoyable with good stories and toasts. Ahh yes, good friends and family make for good times. Hope we embarassed you at least a little bit. Here's to you Aaron and Michelle.